I will be living in Ukraine, with a native family, leaving all familiar people and surroundings behind in the United States. I'm going to the other side of the world!
I feel as if I've been awaiting this moment for a long time...oh wait, I have been! Originally this trip was suppose to happen twelve months ago, but it seems God has others plans for me. In fact, I was suppose to be going to Tehuacan Mexico, not Ukraine. He changed that too. I can't say I'm complaining about the location switch- I've never been to Europe and am thrilled at the chance to go. My language skills for that continant are at level zero....
God had so much to teach me this year. Unfortunately my dense skull had to take some pounding before it let these lessons in- but I am stronger for it now. It's been a year of intense emotional and mental growth, which has, honestly, left me feeling like a half-drowned child. So as I sit here, soaking wet and a handfull wiser, life is still running. My departure for Ukraine comes ever closer and I feel my heart clinging desparately to the people who've been my mortal guardian angels, as well as those I love and care for deeply. It seems they carry a piece of my heart and are an integrated part of who I am.
Loving people is a dangerous thing. It brings the most joy, and likewise, the most pain. I never came close to imagining how much pain love can put you through. I'm not only talking about 'romantic' love. I'm talking about love between family, love between friends, love for those you care for, Christ-like love for the strangers around you every day. It's like having a piece of yourself being placed inside someone else to do with as they please. Or taking a piece of someone inside yourself so you can share their sorrows, and joys. Love has opened my eyes to light and brought me more happiness and gratitude then I could possibly deserve.
Love is the most powerful of anything.
I feel like I would be nothing without it.
Okay I guess that tangent was the first lesson I've begun to see this year. Lesson two is trust- trust in our Heavenly Father and in His Son, Jesus Christ. Trust that He knows who I am and cares for me so deeply no mortal mind can comprehend it. Trust that He KNOWS what is going on and how to take care of me and those I hold dear. Trust in His matchless power and wisdom in using it. I know my faith is still so small, but sometime during these hard months God has helped me deepen the roots of my trust in Him. Truely it has felt like my only stability through each day. While I swam through the deep dark waters of trial and experience, He never left me alone or lost sight of me. When my heart was sure I would drown- He never let me sink. The times I thought I was truely alone were the times I refused to open my eyes and look to him for help.
So as I venture across new waters and into strange lands- I hope I might hold onto the knowledge and wisdom I've gained. I suppose, really, those are the only things you can always carry with you.
Congratulations and a half, Jemma!! Living on your own in another country, especially one where you're not familiar with the language, is scary sometimes! I've gotten homesick multiple times, but I keep telling myself, "This is my mission, this is my mission!" You'll make some of the best memories overseas in Ukraine. :D Lots of love and support to you!
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